When it rains....

Ok, don't laugh. My week started out pretty good. Monday went to the doc for a Rx refill. No biggie. Tuesday after work went and got my hair done. Turned out good. Went home was eating pizza and felt something weird in my mouth...UM...my front tooth (very, very front tooth) broke right out. The whole thing. PIZZA!! Not corn on the cob, not an apple...PIZZA on a fork no less. This was a tooth I had previous work on. It was a crown but for real...breaks and falls right now. Now I look like an utter hillbilly that should be dumpster diving. I kept my mouth covered with my hand until 7:00 the next morning and hightailed it to the dentist. I now have a very lovely temporary crown until I get my permanent one on the 15th. I guess I am just thankful it didn't happen while at work or on vacation, etc.

Next my kidney specialist calls me and my last test came back weird so next Thursday I have a surgery on my right kidney to see if they can "re-wire" it to work properly. Ok, that wasn't on my scope or agenda for next week.

Crazy!

My views

Fellow Blog readers…. don’t read this if you are really into politics and are very serious about them and can’t take a joke or an honest view. This is my thoughts feelings and where I chose to post them.

Ok, all this talk about Presidential elections is getting to me…Presidents, Vice Presidents, Taxes, War, Man vs. Woman, Black & White...we get it. There’s an election. It seems like it has gone on forever and ever and ever…if for some reason people ever wanted to vote for me this is what I would do…..

Shoot first; ask questions later. Rubber bullets for all law enforcement personnel.

Get out of all war areas…bring our people home. Train them here so we can be the biggest, most effective Military we can be. If the other countries want to kill themselves let them.

Quit sending money to Africa, Haiti, Iraq, etc. I am not opposed to helping these people and I don’t have a cold heart however I know there are plenty of sick, homeless, orphans right here in America…can we take a look at Chicago, Detroit, New Orleans…how about we help our own first?

Immigration…better your life yes have me pay for it…NO!! Get a real job, get an education, and earn your “keep”…learn English, volunteer with organizations, help the homeless….crap, and just contribute.

Teenagers…all teenagers at the age 15, 16 & 17 must work 1 year at a fast food joint and “work your way up” just like the rest of us had to. I’m so sick of all these brats (Parents most of you are to blame also) saying “I won’t work fast food, it’s gross, I’m better than that”, etc. I think before you can get a “REAL” job you must do this.

All parents within the first year of their babies life (preferably prior to the baby being born) must attend Parenting classes, money management classes, etc. Get a clue….

Anyway all’s I’m saying is that the Government is a piece of shit, all a bunch of liars and cheats. I could go on and on….

It hurts

Growing up I was at your house daily. Never had to knock, never had to ask for a drink. I had my own cup with my name on it...after all you not only had 7 of your own kids you also had "extras". You gave us the birds and bee's talk, gave us the "Aunt Flo" talk along with countless other talks. I appreciate it more than you know. You raised a great family and they all turned out wonderful. I didn't turn out to bad myself...and I thank you for a lot of that. I will forever love you "Mom".

I miss you so much already.

What a week

Last week was a total blur...My best friends mom passed away, she was like a 2nd mom to me. I grew up pretty much at their house and was one of their kids. So I spent a lot of time over there, at visitation and funeral and hanging out at the house again on Friday...I'll sure miss her.

Brittany ended up in the hospital twice last week also with a horrible Kidney infection. She's finally on the mend.

I finally came to work last Friday just in time for the weekend.

Sure has been crazy!

They are the Best!!

Can I just tell you how great my friends are? They are the best and if I leave anyone off the list I apologize. My “peeps” have really picked me up, listened to me and did not judge at all.

Becky, you always know the right thing to say. With 5 kids, running here and there and all your own stuff you take the time to check in on me. You’re the best.

Missy, the day after you drive all the way from N.D. you find your way to my home just to be there. I got to talk to you more and see you more this time than I have in the last 2 times you’ve been home. One of these days I’m coming to visit you.

Shay, you were there, no questions asked, and brought breakfast goodies…although my stomach couldn’t handle food that was very thoughtful.

Monica, your belief in god and positive attitude lift me up more than you know.

Dawn, I woke you up at 3:30...and you were there before I could hang up the phone. I love you and Daymon…you are my saving grace.

Gina, we’ve been each others sounding board for a couple weeks now. A friendship from long ago that has reconnected. I am very glad to have you back in my life.

Ang, there is not a day that goes by that you don’t call and ask “how are you today?”..checking in on me. Thanks for letting me hang out at your house. You & Bob mean so much to me. You know how to be objective yet firm and I am grateful.

I’d give my left arm for them….ok, and for all you others too but this week given everything I owe them big.

Thanks

Thanks for all of your kind words, thoughts and prayers...it's going to be a long few months and I pray with all my heart we come out on top. I'm still not ready to discuss out here yet but if you want to send me your email address I can fill in a bit more.

Love to all.

I need you

Lord I need you now more than ever. Please help us through this difficult time. Help him to help himself and know that I love him more than anything in this world. Please guide us, help us and support us.

For those of you reading this...please pray..pray like you never have before...I can't really go into details at the moment just know I need you...our family needs you.

Some pic's

Here is some new pics of Brittany & Jake

OCD-or whatever you want to call this blog?!?

Kiss my days and weekends goodbye until November. Football starts on Monday! This is my favorite time of year. I’m such an organization geek. I love to organize the teams, paperwork, concessions, coaches….just be involved. I may complain about it sometimes but when someone tries to help me out or when people make me delegate tasks it drives me crazy! I think I’m a bit OCD about controlling stuff like this.

Ok…who am I kidding I’m OCD about controlling everything. Dan tells me all the time “Just let it go, it’s not your problem”…(like some of the paperwork was not being done on time) and I was freaking out about it or heaven forbid I can’t have control over something that is beyond my control…like weather, other people being late, sickness, etc and because I have to be in control of everything, I’m usually early for everything so I can be the first to touch it, feel it, do it,….he also tells me I have to leave 10 minutes early to be 20 minutes early for an event.

This is a good thing and a bad thing…good because I am very organized, have control, get things done early…bad because I tend to have a “heart attack” about things that are not going smoothly.

Ok..that’s my ramble for the day.

(I just read this back and wow, am I jabbering or what?)

Number's not up

Ok..so my number isn't up..I'm not dying..I went and got my results from the 19 vials of blood they took and the good news is they found nothing..and the bad news is, they found nothing...the only thing abnormal was my levels for allergens were up.

No crap...really? I could have told you that and not drained a gallon of blood out of me.

Anyway she is calling it a transient allergy (comes and goes) no reason, no warning...so the medicine they gave me seems to help with the itching and that is all that matters to me...I was going crazy.

So, I guess I'm fine.

Get out of my head

Recently I got to thinking about “What ifs”…why, I don’t know…I don’t dwell on them but sometimes I tend to think bad “What ifs”…I guess that wouldn’t make me a mom if I didn’t, right?

Since Dan’s not working, what if I lost my job too?

What if one of my kids gets seriously sick?

What if one of my parents die, how will I help the other?

What if my house was on fire and I could only save one other person?

What if I became blind?

Ok…you get the idea right? Just rambling and not sure why all of a sudden these things are popping into my head.

I'm gonna suck your blood......

You would have thought I got attacked by a vampire today!!...I went to the allergist and she wants to rule out a million things before we go down another path for the itchies. I got a stronger pill...I haven't itched all day...yeah me!!! :-)

She did order every blood test in the book. Liver, Kidney, Thyroid, Immune, foods, panels, CBC's....and 19 vials later..yes, you read that right they drew 19 vials of blood from me today. They took 10 in my right arm before she lost it then switched to my left side for the other 9. Then made me sit there for 15 minutes to make sure I was ok. Gees, I didn't know a person had that much blood they could just give up. So hopefully by the end of next week I'll hear back from the doc and see what she says.

What now??

So back in December I started itching at first I thought it was dry skin due to the dry weather in the winter time. Gooped myself up with lotions/aloe…you name it I tried it. Pretty soon I was itching on a daily basis and no place was excempt. Lips, Head, Legs, Behind, Neck. I went to see a dermatologist and at this point the more I itched the more I welted/hived/bumped up. It feels like fire ants biting me. It not only itches it's drives me crazy. Luckly the allgergist gave me an allergy shot. That was March…it is now July and I have been to 3 doctors, taken several different meds and nothing…I continue to itch to the point and I bleeding, breaking blood vessels or bruising myself to death…not to mention I'm still going INSANE!!!! I go tomorrow morning to see an allergist. I have been keeping track of what I eat and there is one thing that really sets me off in a frenzy and that is Pizza. I have been told it may be a yeast/wheat/gluten allergy but they won't know until I test. UGH….so until then I am clock watching until it's 7:30 tomorrow morning.

Fell off the face of the earth

Yep, so I fell off the face of the earth forever but I'm back. It's hard when kids are in ball 4-5 nights a week. Now we are starting football season...yeah, my fave!!

I'm going to try to be better about blogging but does anyone really read these? If you do let me know.....

Tomorrows post: Itching.....why??

Miscellaneous stuff

I read two fantastic books this weekend. Yes, both books in one weekend. I couldn’t put them down. The first was called Waiting with Gabriel. It’s a story of a family who struggles when they find out the child they are carrying has a fatal heart defect and won’t live much past birth. It made me cry through most of the book but showed the family’s heartbreak, acceptance and peace through a very difficult time. The second book was called It’s all about Him. This story is by Denise Jackson the wife of Country Music legend Alan Jackson. It’s about their struggles through fame, infidelity and her willingness to accept God in her life and a spiritual journey. It had a very strong message and one that spoke to me. I am Catholic, go to church, try to be a good person, don’t deny that I sin but I have not fully let my life be an open book and fully let Him show me the way. I’m going to work on that.

Sorry if the above sounded like a commercial for those books. Now that I read it back it sounds like a written review. Funny.

Well T-minus 21 days and counting until I register for school. I feel scared, nervous…wondering what in the world I am getting myself into and what if I can’t do it? What if I can’t finish..what if it’s to hard? Why didn’t I go right after I got out of High School? Going back to school at 34 (by the time school starts) is not cool but I’m going to try.

Baseball and Softball start for both kids shortly. I always love to go to the games and see how well they’ve progressed from last year but then again it reminds me that I like winter with no sports to run to here and there.

I got glasses a week ago. Figured I’d need reading glasses as my eyes were tired while doing work on the computer but really I needed progressives. Far and near-sided…nice. So I have to wear them all the time. So far I haven’t done to horrible at trying to adjust. Take them off occasionally just because my nose/ears hurt.

We had to take our kids out of daycare starting last week as Dan is laid off. I know he gets unemployment but it freaks me out because not sure if or when he’ll pick up again. There are no other jobs out there available. He’s sent his resume out on a few but nothing. The economy and especially in Michigan is just horrible. Hopefully it won’t affect us to bad. Needless to say home renovations are on hold. That’s ok though.

Wow, this blog is all over the place…we’ll guess that’s why I call it rambling.

Until next time….

Houston we have a problem...

I've been here for 6 years and in those 6 years 37 people have been shit canned for no good reason...it's always "restructuring"....and then nothing good ever comes from it, we only have 32 people anyway... it's like a friggin revolving door around here. Good thing I only have two small pic's on my desk. You never know when you will be next.

Would someone just shoot me please?

So at this place...lets call it work, there is a gal who got "promoted" to a new position and if I have to hear her say "I'm the director of education" or a reference to being the "Director of Education" one more time, I'm going to poke my eye out. It's wonderful, fabulous, great that she got a new position but quit talking about the friggin "title" and just do the job...for the love.

Two Things

One:

Ok...so met with the MWCL people and they have changed the program a bit from last time and it's just gonna happen this time with me so I've made a decsion to just make better choices and start working out. Slow, just walking on the treadmill, every other day. Something.

Two:

I have made an appointment with and LCC advisor to talk about some classes and my future.

That's all for now.

Here we go again

Well, I’ve decided that I am probably the #1 prime candidate for a heart attack, even at 33. I truly eat like crap! I eat too much fast food, processed foods and junk and have for years. I don’t exercise. I am a tad more active in the summer but not much. I am pretty much a couch potato.

Everyday I wish I looked smaller, healthier, better…but the only person who can help me do that is me. I’ve tried 75 million diets, eating plans, etc. and I always give up. No good reason, I just do. There was one program I tried last year, Medical Weight Loss that seemed to do the best for me but then I got sick with my Kidney issues again and stopped going.

A few weeks back at one of Dan’s gig’s a gal named Kathy approached me and we started talking about loosing weight and she was telling me that I could and she was motivating me. I’d never met her before but somehow felt like I knew her forever and in those two weeks since we spoke I have really taken a stock of my life and what she said….I’m going to really try to get back on track.

I met with the team at Medical Weight Loss this week and am going to start back on that program again once all my medical evaluations are done. They require lab work, EKG’s and other things. I also went online and found some basic beginner treadmill/running exercises. I bought a new pair of tennis shoes, hand weights and an MP3 player, so I’m geared up to go.

I’m semi-excited but also apprehensive because my track record with diets/exercise haven’t been that great.

So, here we go again……

It's not yours!

So it's 7:10 am. yesterday morning and I am just rounding up the kids to head out the door for school/work and my phone rings. It's my very good friend/manager/co-worker balling her eyes out. I can't understand really what she is saying but I finally understood "my truck is gone". She had her vehicle stolen right out of her driveway in the middle of the night along with her spare set of keys that included keys to her home. The did find her SUV ran out of gas in front of a gas station and it had been towed because it was blocking the driveway to the station. The theif of course bailed out but they left behind a nice box cutter dangerous type knife thing, black gloves and a comdom box. GROSS! They didn't find her extra set of keys so they spent the day changing all the locks to the house and dealing with the insurance people since the guy also took some personal items from her ride.....It was crazy.

I don't understand why some people feel they can just take your stuff. You work hard for it, you keep your job, have an education in order to obtain decent things and these gangster thugs just walk up take it it like you "owe" them and it pisses me off. I hope they are able to get good prints and find the perps. She had her work cell phone in there charging but hidden and they took that and they called the phone about 11:30 am that morning and a man with a very thugish/ghetto accent answered the phone and so they "confronted" him and the guy hung up. Work had the service turned off. The whole thing makes me so mad that people don't have morals, standards, regards for other property and are just loosers.

Ok, I'll get off my soap box now.

By the way Deej, if you read this I don't know how you were ever a cop..I'd shoot and ask questions later. You are a good man my friend.

Jump for Joy

After many, many tests, reviews, interviews, etc they finally have a conclusion as to why Jacob is having such a hard time in school. We have an answer….

Phonemic Awareness Disability

Ok, bottom line, he has a hard time separating sounds therefore he has a hard time reading and writing... along with his “working” memory. This is a form of Dyslexia.

His math scores are above normal, his analytical thinking and intellectual skills are above normal. So we knew we had an issue with the books…he’s a smart kid just can’t read and write.

We meet with the “team” on Wednesday and they will go over his I.E.P. schedule (Individual Education Program) he will remain in his own class but leave for “special help” daily on his reading and writing and this will follow him throughout school up to the 11th grade as long and he needs it. They re-test every 3rd year to see if he needs the program anymore and more exciting is he can go to 3rd grade when it’s time.

I am very excited and hope it works.

Vist from beyond

So, I think last night I had a visit from someone on the other side. If you beleive in such a thing. I know someone who passed back in August. I was not real close with her but knew her and hung out with mutual people. Anyway, last night in my "dream" she came to my porch while I was sitting on it and I was suprised to see her and gave her a hug and said "how are you?" and she said "I'm doing good now, Nickie"....and that was it. I woke up. Weird and I've been bothered by it all day...if it was really her telling me she was ok, why did she pick me and why 5 months after she died? Maybe it really was a dream.

Alter-Ego or Mid-Life?

This whole blog will not make sense to anyone I'm sure and maybe make me look like a psyco?

Sometimes I feel like I am two different people, well one to everyone and "what I am supposed to be" and then the one that secretly wants to come out and play...ok, so if you knew me, you'd know that I'm married, a mom, a cheerleading coach, a church going, hard working Catholic girl who wants to do right, who wants to see the good in everyone who wants to beleive I am on the right path (the Marsha Brady/Mandy Moore type) but my other side really wants to rebel right now...I want my tattoos to show, I want to get a nose ring, I want to be the "punk" who doesn't give a crap about what others think, say or feel (the Pink/Green Day type) who wants to work the non-traditional 9-5 slacker job....somehow I will continue to suppress that person and know I am who I am